When we think of friendship, we think of encouragement and positivity. However, we’ve all been in a relationship with someone (whether it’s a friend, family member, or partner) that’s more toxic in nature.

Just from their appearance, we know toxic friendships aren’t good. What many don’t consider is the implications it has on our mental health.

Being around someone who causes more harm than good puts you in a position where you have no choice but to question yourself. This questioning can lead to negative feelings, such as anxiety and depression.

Throughout this article, we’re going to look into how toxic friends affect your mental health.

What is a Toxic Friendship?

Toxic friendships come in all shapes and sizes. Generally speaking, they’re defined as unhealthy relations with another person. As mentioned, this can be between friends, family members, or intimate partners.

Gillian Needleman says you know you’re in a toxic relationship when “you’re unable to have a meaningful and positive connection with the other person and this often leaves you questioning yourself.”

Many of us may be in toxic relationships without even knowing it. Often, it takes some time and maturity to truly understand the negative impact a friendship has on you.

What Are the Signs of a Toxic Friendship?

Some key signs of a toxic friendship include:

• Always Critical – Do you find that your friend or yourself are always being critical towards one another? While criticism can be beneficial, too much can lead to self-doubt.

• Destructive Patterns – If you find your friendship is one-sided, it’s natural for some destructive patterns to appear. A common example is one side always giving while the other always receives. This may appear as lending a helping hand (i.e. giving advice, financial help, etc.). However, when the other side requires help, they likely won’t return the favor.

• Emotional Manipulation – Does your friend use things against you to get what they want? For example, they may make you feel guilty about a past action to obtain something now.

The ultimate sign of a toxic relation is when the other person isn’t helping you become a better person. If your relationship with them only makes you feel exhausted and neglected, you’re likely better off without the individual.

How Toxic Is Your Friendship?

You’ll likely experience some toxic traits within each of your friends at one point or another. It’s impossible for relationships to always have a positive outcome. Remember, we’re only human.

The key difference between toxic and healthy relationships is how much the negative traits outweigh the good. While this can be difficult to measure, it’s important to consider.

If you find that the good traits of your relationship outweigh the bad ones, you can likely resolve any difficulty you run into. However, if it’s difficult for you and your friend to come to resolutions, the relationship may be considered toxic.

If you have difficulty figuring this out, consider how they make you feel after you’re with them. If you feel drained with heavy emotions – to the point where you’d prefer not to be with them – you likely shouldn’t be around that person.

How to Move On From a Toxic Relationship

Even if you’re in a toxic relationship, there’s a good chance you don’t want to break boundaries with that person. This is understandable and there are ways to develop a bad friendship into a healthy one.

However, it’s important to note that even through your efforts, it’s vital you don’t expect the best of all outcomes. We say this is because the outcome is out of your control. The steps you take to get to this outcome are all you have in your power and, if a healthier friendship fails to prevail, it may be in your best interest to simply walk away.

But before you give up so suddenly, here are a few things to consider:

• What are your emotions?
  
  If you question whether or not you’re in a toxic relationship, chances are you’re experiencing some negative emotions. Identify these emotions and remove them from the relationship. While your friendship may trigger them, there’s a chance they could also be coming from a deeper place within you.

• What are your boundaries?
  
  If you think the friendship is worth rectifying, you’ll want to establish some basic rules between you and the other person. Obviously, these will vary from friendship to friendship – however, they most often always revolve around the triggers mentioned above. Consider when your friendship brings negative emotions and what can be done to overcome these circumstances.

• Keep true to your word.
  
  While it’s easy for some to understand their emotions and develop some basic rules, the real challenge is making sure these expectations are met. It’s common for people to become unfocused and give up at some point. Stand your ground and stay true to your word.

Final Word – When to Move On

If you’ve followed the above and still find yourself in a toxic friendship, it may be best to simply walk away. This can be difficult as some may not want to leave a toxic friendship. However, it takes a certain level of maturity to understand that a friendship just isn’t working out. And that the best thing for both parties is to simply walk away.

It should be noted that this shouldn’t be your initial move. When dealing with a toxic friendship, a lot is likely going on in the other person’s life. If you at least attempt to overcome the barriers, you’re showing that you’re still willing to give the friendship a chance.