One of the most essential elements of emotional intelligence for men is empathy building. Throughout this article, we’ll discuss what building empathy looks like and strategies you can develop to strengthen your own.

What is Empathy?

Empathy is often confused with “sympathy” and “compassion,” however, these are not the same. In order to feel empathy, you must feel with other people, not just for them. If you’re empathetic, you’re not assuming how someone else feels—you’re experiencing their feelings with them. ¹

What are the Benefits of Empathy?

Empathy plays an essential role in our interactions with one another. It allows us to understand what someone else is experiencing and provides us with the opportunity to respond in an authentic manner. The following are other empathy skills you receive when you build this emotional intelligence trait:

1.) Encourages Openness

If you believe that someone understands you, you’re more likely to share your authentic feelings. Therefore, empathy can help you transform casual interactions into deeper and more open relationships.

2.) Makes You and the Other Person Feel Better

Emotions are often contageous. When we experience something like joy, it’s natural for those around us to also experience this emotion.

However, emotions are even stronger when you practice empathy development. It allows you to not only understand someone else’s emotions but also help carry them through emotional difficulties they may experience.

3.) Improves Communication

If you lack empathy, chances are you find it difficult to communicate with others. The reason is simple—you don’t truly understand where they’re coming from. By teaching empathy to yourself, you give yourself the opportunity to clear misunderstandings and properly communicate with others.

4.) Strengthens Emotional Intelligence

As you continue to build empathy, you’ll notice that you have a better understanding and appreciation for others. You’re encouraging acceptance, open-mindedness, and patience—traits that make you more self-aware and give you more room to self-regulate.

As you can see, such traits are some of the core components of emotional intelligence. Therefore, by practicing empathy, you naturally improve your EQ.

5.) Encourages Connection

As discussed, becoming empathetic allows you to better understand where other people come from. It’s like a sixth sense. It allows you to be more aware of your surroundings and develop stronger connections with friends, family, co-workers, and your significant other.

8 Empathy Building Exercises

Empathy exercises are like building an other muscle—the more time you dedicate to them, the stronger you’ll get. In order to build empathy, there are simple steps you can take that will improve your skills over time.

However, that’s the important key factor to remember. Empathy building doesn’t happen overnight. This is a journey where trials and errors should be expected. Still, the deeper you go into this journey, the larger the difference you’ll find in your interpersonal relationships and mental health.

1.) Practice Mindfulness

One of the first steps in any compassion training is to become more self-aware. What’s the most effective way to do this? Mindfulness exercises. If you’re not sure where to begin, consider the following:

• Breathing exercises
• Gratitude journaling
• Meditation
• Mindful eating
• Nature walks
• Visualization
• Yoga

All of these exercises have one thing in common: they teach you how to stay present. Staying present helps you tune into your feelings and others’ emotions with greater compassion. Furthermore, it reduces stress and reactivity, allowing for more thoughtful, empathetic responses and deeper connections. ²

2.) Develop Your Curiosity

The more curious you are, the easier you’ll find it to imagine what it’s like to be in someone else’s shoes. How do you embrace curiosity? A good start is by diving into books, movies, and conversations—notably, with people very different from you.

Such curiosity will help you develop a deeper understanding of others. It will force you to ask yourself what emotions you’d experience if you were in their position and the type of support you’d want to receive.

However, keep in mind that this curiosity has to be authentic. You cannot force yourself to become more curious in other people. It needs to come from a place that genuinely desires to see things from their perspective.

3.) Actively Listen

One of the most difficult elements of our conversations is most people don’t listen. Therefore, if you participate in active listening, you’re already one step ahead of those around you.

When someone else is speaking, focus on their words, non-verbal cues, and the emotions they speak with. Reflect on what you notice and it shows you’re really listening to what they have to say.

4.) Notice Non-Verbal Expressions

Going off that last point, you want to pay extra attention to non-verbal expressions. These can reveal elements about a person that goes beyond what they’re telling you. For example: ³

• Eye contact shows that you’re confident and engaged. Avoiding such can indicate discomfort or disinterest.

• Facial expressions (i.e. a smile, frown, or raised eyebrow) convey emotions without words being spoken. These are universal and can quickly reveal signs of happiness, confusion, or concern.

• Body language (i.e. postures, gestures, and movements) can also reveal emotions. For example, crossed arms might suggest defensiveness, while leaning forward can indicate interest.

5.) Question Yourself

When you’re learning how to build empathy, it’s important to take a healthy look at yourself in the mirror. Remember that you go through life with a unique perspective that’s not shared with anyone else. Therefore, others also have their own unique perspectives.

Try to take notice when you make a judgment about other people. Attempt to understand other perspectives on a topic or situation before rushing to your own conclusions.

6.) Don’t Make Assumptions

Going off that last point, it’s also better to avoid making guesses about what someone else is feeling. Instead, you can simply ask them to get their perspective.

Furthermore, by asking thoughtful questions, you demonstrate a level of care and curiosity. Naturally, this will make people want to share with you their own experiences and points of view. the more you engage with this, the more you’ll build empathy.

When it comes to empathy in relationships, avoiding assumptions is key. Often, partners find themselves in relationship stress due to playing the “blame game.” By taking a step back and trying to understand your significant other’s perspective, you’re more likely to shift blame away from them (and yourself) and find resolution to the matter.

7.) Ask for Feedback

As you go about self-reflection, it can be crucial to ask others for feedback on your performance. Naturally, you’ll never be able to indicate every element of your empathy building. Other people can greatly help you in getting a fresh perspective on challenges you may face while also understanding how you appear from others’ points of view.

It’s natural if you’re not 100% sure how to go about this. It can be awkward to ask friends to keep an eye on your compassion training. One efficient way to receive feedback is the next time you’re in a conversation with someone, ask them if they feel as though you’ve understood where they’re coming from.

8.) Embrace Humility

As you develop empathy, it’s essential you step out of our comfort zone. This can mean embracing new experiences or putting yourself through stronger challenges.

Either way, new experiences help you develop a sense of humility, allowing you to appreciate feelings you may not be familiar with. By embracing the unfamiliar, you’ll have an easier time understanding the emotions of others.

Final Word

While empathy building doesn’t happen over night, by putting in the time towards these practices, we guarantee you’ll develop a better understanding of those around you.

If you struggle with some of these techniques, it may help to particpate in therapy. This will allow you to pinpoint where your personal struggles come from and what you need to do to overcome them.

Empathy Building FAQs

References

¹ Riess H. The Science of Empathy. J Patient Exp. 2017 Jun;4(2):74-77. doi: 10.1177/2374373517699267. Epub 2017 May 9. PMID: 28725865; PMCID: PMC5513638.

² Hu Z, Wen Y, Wang Y, Lin Y, Shi J, Yu Z, Lin Y, Wang Y. Effectiveness of mindfulness-based interventions on empathy: A meta-analysis. Front Psychol. 2022 Oct 20;13:992575. doi: 10.3389/fpsyg.2022.992575. PMID: 36337535; PMCID: PMC9632989.

³ Burgoon JK, Wang X, Chen X, Pentland SJ, Dunbar NE. Nonverbal Behaviors “Speak” Relational Messages of Dominance, Trust, and Composure. Front Psychol. 2021 Jan 26;12:624177. doi: 10.3389/fpsyg.2021.624177. PMID: 33574790; PMCID: PMC7870468.